Melissa Ricks shares journey battling inner ‘demons’: ‘Not being okay is OK’

Image: Instagram/@mellyricks09

Actress Melissa Ricks was recently chosen as one of the 12 lucky content creators by YouTube NextUp, a feat that Ricks found hard to believe as she wasn’t expecting to be chosen at all.

Ricks shared to her fans on Instagram last Sept. 15 that the past couple of years have been hard for her. Ricks hasn’t appeared much on television these days since she gave birth to her daughter Kiera back in 2015, an event that saw her suffer from post-partum depression shortly after.

In her post, Ricks showed pictures of her looking emotional and reduced to tears during her time at the YouTube NextUp camp, which is designed to teach vloggers and content creators how to create better videos, get more subscribers and take their channel to the next level.

“The truth is the past couple of years have been tough for me,” Ricks wrote. “Then #YTNextUp came along. Prior to this I said no to every tv guesting or work offered to me or even events to attend, I turn them all down, because I just couldn’t do it.”

https://www.instagram.com/p/BnvxeVjFTlQ/?hl=en&taken-by=mellyricks09

As her appearances on TV lessened, Ricks took to YouTube to become a vlogger. Today, she has over 30, 000 subscribers and vlogs about single motherhood, parenting, cooking, and anything out of the blue.

She shared to her fans that despite being chosen by YouTube Next Up, she felt afraid to go.

“Was thinking of reasons not to go and get out of it, I was getting anxiety before and during the 5 days I was there, but I pushed through with it. I thought to my self, God wanted me to be there and he chose me amongst so many who wanted to participate.”

The pictures she shared were taken on the last day of the camp. As per Ricks, she was reduced to tears because her co-creators in the camp made her feel appreciated.

” For so long I have been doubting myself, constantly putting myself down, making myself small. But they saw me differently,” she wrote. “They knew who I was, or what I did before all this, but that didn’t matter, they saw me for who I am, they said I was an inspiration, someone that was strong and that I was real.”

She added that she had been trying to be strong for so long and keeping everything inside, so that she cried when she heard her peers’ praises. Her YouTube videos have made a lot of people happy and helped other single moms like her along the way, and this alone meant so much to her.

“YES I’m a single mom, YES I gained a lot of weight, YES I’m not active in showbiz anymore, YES I have made mistakes and YES I’m still battling my demons but that doesn’t define me,” Ricks said. “Not being okay is OK. Let’s not let depression, anxiety, anger and hate get the best of us. Let’s push through.”  /ra

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