Cranky celeb joins kin in crowded closet
There has always been something fishy about Egregious Jouster, who is a tad too petulant for comfort.
And when EJ is in a lousy mood, the closet’s door gets blown off the hinges. EJ would often throw a hissy fit like a deranged diva.
According to a mole, EJ shares a hunky lover with someone who’s openly gay. The guy’s other benefactor doesn’t seem to mind the arrangement.
Interestingly, EJ isn’t the only one in the clan who’s supposedly hiding in the closet. EJ’s relatives, Vindictive Gadfly and Eccentric Dude, are card-carrying members of the rainbow coalition, as well.
It’s all in the family!
Powerhouse ensemble
Remember Scintillating Vixen who backed out of a Mammoth Venture?
Mercurial Bigwig managed to find not just one, but two deserving replacements for SV.
Joining the enterprise are Vivacious Artiste and Astonishing Guardian.
Of course, the star of the whole shebang remains to be SC’s fierce competitor, Amazing Nemesis.
Completing the ensemble are seasoned stars: Gifted Entertainer, Dashing Beau and Playful Jock. It’s a pity that SV can’t join this powerhouse ensemble.
Professional faker
Former minions simply cannot forgive and forget Giddy Benefactor’s lies.
GB claims to have survived a near-fatal illness.
Overly melodramatic GB would feign gratitude for a new lease of life. Well, frenemies now suspect all that theatrics was hogwash—especially after they uncovered GB’s past shenanigans.
They found out that GB was slapped with a scandalous multi-million case involving financial fraud.
A faker, through and true.
Tsk. Tsk.
Not so innocent
From the Inquirer tabloid Bandera:
No wonder Bodacious Rogue is quite skillful when it comes to bedroom mazurka.
BR started bed-hopping at an early age. To think, BR used to portray winsome, wholesome babes onscreen.
Turned out Snow White wasn’t so pristine, after all.
But then again, BR’s talent in the boudoir was precisely what impressed former lover, Decadent Weasel.
TOP OF THE TABLOIDS
This week’s top show biz news in the Inquirer tabloid Bandera (and why we are moved, if we are moved):
Regine Velasquez, kalahating bilyon daw ang talent fee sa ABS-CBN! (Impressive!)
Zsa Zsa Padilla
Zsa Zsa Padilla masama ang loob sa ASAP. (Expressive!)
Coco Martin
TV commercial ni Coco Martin ginaya ni Jake Zyrus sa viral video; nilait, binastos ng bashers. (Explosive!)
Kasal ni Lotlot de Leon sa boyfriend na foreigner tuloy na tuloy na … Dumating kaya si Ate Guy (Nora Aunor)? (Speculative!)
Elisse Joson
Elisse Joson handa nang ma-bash ng JoshLia fans: “Sanay na ako!” (Poor girl.)
Sam Milby bulol pa rin (sa pag-deliver ng dialogue); pinayuhang karirin ang pag-aaral ng Tagalog. (Maybe Daniel Matsunaga, Ryan Bang and Daiana Menezes can help, right Martin Nievera?)
Kris Aquino hindi sinuwerte sa audition bilang bartender sa US series. (Lagot kayo kay Bimby!)
#CainAtAbel No.1 sa trending topic sa Twitter PH. (What about its ratings?)
Kim Domingo “pulutan” ng mga barako sa “Bubble Gang.” (What do you think of Kim…kinilaw, sisig or tokneneng?))
Toto Natividad at isa pang direktor umalis sa “Ang Probinsyano” dahil kay Coco? (Lagot!)
Kris Bernal kinarir ang pagsasalita at kilos ng mga adik. (Now that’s dedication.)
