Beauty queen persona taking a step back as Catriona’s music comes forward

For her first self-penned single, “Love Language,” Catriona Gray opted to use only her first name—a move that she felt would help set apart her music-artist side from the glitzy beauty pageant persona that most people associate her with.

As she rekindles her pursuit for a career as a singer-songwriter, Catriona—the celebrity, spokesperson and Miss Universe 2018 titleholder—intends to step back to allow her music take the spotlight.

“This song was released under ‘Catriona,’ because it’s separate from previous songs that were aligned with my beauty pageant image. The visuals for this and how I want to present myself is more pulled back—not a lot of glam. I’m trying to change that notion wherein people are used to seeing me at front and center,” she told the Inquirer in a recent one-on-one interview arranged by Warner Music Philippines (WMP).

In the “Love Language” music video, for instance, the 27-year-old celebrity isn’t made up as she usually would for a show biz or a pageant-related affair. While her beauty still suffuses the screen, her looks aren’t in-your-face glamorous. They’re more artistic or conceptual, with a greater emphasis on light as a visual element.

Borderless platforms

The song, which Catriona crafted with producer and fellow Filipino-Australian Cabu, was inspired by the many different ways people give and receive love, and how they can, at times, complicate relationships, both romantic and platonic. The song is also part of WMP’s Global Pinoy Music—a movement that promotes Filipino music and allows local musicians to collaborate with international artists “through borderless platforms.”

“Of course, I’m still part of that image—I’m just trying to step back a little and let the music come forward instead. It would be interesting to see how it all evolves as I make more music and develop my vision. It’s such an exciting thing to look forward to,” she said.

Excerpts from our interview:

You have released songs before, but this is the first time you put out something you wrote. How did you find the courage to do it?

I surprised myself, because I hadn’t written a song before. I had this thing on my mind where I felt like songwriting should be a certain way.

But the way it comes to me is that, when I get overwhelmed with emotions and I get very analytical … When my mind is busy, I write things down. The line that inspired the song came from my notes.

It’s a new experience. Let’s see where it leads us.

The song has R&B, soul and jazz elements to it. Was that how you intended it to sound?

When I created “Love Language” it wasn’t with the intention of doing something R&B-, soul- or jazz-flavored. It’s just that the chords on which the song were laid upon were warm and jazzy. How it ended up sounding like that was an organic process. The song started out from the lyrics, as opposed to me going for a certain sound.

But were you influenced by those genres?

I have always resonated with jazz and soulful music, which I grew up listening to. So I wouldn’t be mad if that became my main sound as an artist! But I’m still definitely growing and learning. If you were to ask who is Catriona as an artist and what’s her genre, I’m not sure if I can stay in one box.

What was your reaction when you heard the final version of the song?

I was incredibly proud of it. I had no idea if it would be any good or not­­­—that was my fear venturing to songwriting.

What was it like collaborating with Cabu?

I appreciated that he allowed it to be a collaboration, and let the song go where I felt it was going. He tweaked a thing or two, but he allowed me to push for what I thought the melody should be …

The song has this chill and sultry vibe, and I think your vocals hit a sweet spot here.

I just tried to sing it how I felt it should be interpreted. I was more inspired by the vulnerable lyrics, so I thought it shouldn’t be approached as a power ballad. The tone is sultry and drawn back, and just has a few moments where it rises and falls.

Your speaking voice sounds very different from your singing voice, which is a lot deeper and huskier.

I get that a lot! (laughs) I always joke that maybe it’s my old self coming out. I have always spoken with a nasal tone since I was young. But my [deeper] voice just comes out naturally when I start singing.

Maybe your love for soulful music has something to do with it.

While I was growing up, there was always music playing. And it was a vast array because my dad was born in the ’40s and my mom in the ’60s. I was born in the ’90s, so the radio was jumping around, from Elvis Presley, to disco music, to ’90s hits. I have a big appreciation for music across different genres.

But Ella Fitzgerald was one of the artists that I really fell in love with. I’m in awe of her vocal abilities.

Tell us about the music video.

I’m quite hands-on with everything I do. I wanted it to be a play on light, refraction and reflection; on shadow and contrast and spotlight. And that grew into the idea of visualizing the different love languages. I didn’t want a storyline. I just wanted visuals that would complement the music and allow listeners to interpret it as they wish.

They say there are different love languages, like words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, gifts and physical touch. Do you believe in those?

We don’t give and receive love the same way. We’re all unique and there are different levels and numbers of love languages. It doesn’t have to be just those five, but it’s a simple way to wrap our minds around it.

How my parents raised me and showed love to me are acts of service. I always see them doing things for the family, making sacrifices and working. I also adopted that type of love language. I’m a provider now, the breadwinner of the family, so I go out of my way to do things for them.

Being an advocate also entails acts of service. It’s just a big part of who I am.

How were you able to stay creative amid the pandemic?

It compelled me to go on a deep dive and explore my emotions. I listened to other people’s stories; inspiration doesn’t have to be just from your own insights. Writing has been therapeutic. And I’m proud I was able to take something I have written down during a confusing and overwhelming moment, and turn it into a song.

Where does singing rank among your career priorities now?

It’s one of my front-running priorities now. I wanted to pursue it wholeheartedly when I was 18, but ended up not doing it, because I became the family breadwinner. I have to put that dream on the back burner. And then there were the people telling me that music isn’t a profession that would pay the bills. There’s always that stigma about pursuing a career in the creative field.

And then pageantry came in.

I always reassess myself and figure out what fulfills me as a person. I want my work to have a purpose … And music has repositioned itself as one of my priorities because it keeps me sane in a time where we all feel bombarded. It’s a way to decompress.

And now I feel like I’m in the right position to do it, because I’m surrounded by people who encourage me. You can expect me to put out more music.

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