Can’t teach old dogs–and spoiled brats–new tricks

Gargantuan Egghead (GE) has always been known for her snooty behavior. Her costar Senior Icon (SI) noted that GE was much “nicer” when she was still swooning over her dashing ex-beau Macho Dearie (MD). At the height of their flirtatious courtship, SI would often overhear GE giggling, as if she were tickled to death.

But theirs was a romance that was doomed from the start. You can’t really teach old dogs—and spoiled brats—new tricks. When the dust finally settled, it didn’t take long for GE’s surly persona to resurface with a vengeance. After all, it isn’t easy to keep up appearances and appear nice even when you’re not.

Consider yourself lucky if GE is in any mood to “interact” with you. In a recent out-of-town gig, reporters covering the event were thrilled to see GE rubbing elbows with other guests. But while her colleagues were only too happy to chat with the press, GE thought hobnobbing with them was beyond her. She wouldn’t even look at them.

When GE saw members of the press milling around her, she kept her head low and pretended not see or hear them. Then, she got her rude entourage to shoo the pesky strangers away.

But acting with the lovelier, classier and more seasoned Prodigious Lass (PL) taught GE a lesson in humility.

To be fair, GE is really no slouch at acting. But when she was cast alongside PL in a movie, GE ended up looking like her sophisticated costar’s trying-hard “alalay,” because her English lines sounded forced and awkward. It was obvious GE wasn’t anywhere near PL’s familiarity with the Queen’s language. There are things you can’t fake or act your way out of, missy.

Postscript: PL got rave reviews, but feedback for GE’s performance was far from flattering. Now isn’t karma a b*tch—and score-evening?

TOP OF THE TABLOIDS

This week’s top show biz news in the Inquirer tabloid Bandera (and why we are moved, if we are moved):
Gerald Anderson, Julia Barretto sunog na sunog sa socmed; kuyog sa fans ni Bea Alonzo. (Sounds like hell has no fury like fans scorned.)
Bea sumabog na, matindi ang hugot sa relasyong Gerald-Julia: Tama na! (For her, twice is enough.)
Joshua Garcia ni-like ang hugot ni Bea: I’m mute… (Of course, he can relate.)
Julia dedma sa Gerald-Bea breakup; umawra sa beach. (Parang wala lang?)
Gerald umamin na raw kay Dennis Padilla, hiniwalayan si Bea para kay Julia? (Huli ka! Getting the father’s blessing agad?)

Nadine Lustre bitter daw sa pagkapili kay Jane de Leon bilang Darna! (Just count your blessings, gurl.)

Jane sasabak na sa matinding training. Patutunayan sa mga tao na may K maging Darna! (The pressure is on.)
Jane “milyonarya” agad dahil sa Darna! (Wow! Like winning the lotto?)

Yeng Constantino nag-sorry sa doctor, medical staff: Nagkamali po ako. (Humility is being able to accept mistakes.)

Dingdong Dantes kinarir ang military training para sa “Descendants:” Grabe! Ang tindi nu’n, sobrang hirap! (Trabaho lang. Nothing like Matteo Guidicelli’s motivation.)
Ice Seguerra, Liza Diño tuloy na ang paggawa ng baby sa December! (Good luck!)
Maymay Entrata ‘asawa’ na ang tawag kay Edward Barber: Wag n’yo siyang ilalayo… (Possessive! Parang totohanan na.)
Phillip, Robin Padilla, Bayani Agbayani ‘3 musketeers’ ni Digong. (Well said!)
Sharon Cuneta niregaluhan ng lechon ni Robin bilang peace offering: OK na tayo, ’di ba?! (Obviously, he knows her too well.)