Depressed celeb suffers mishap

STUDIO provides Jasmine Curtis-Smith a bodyguard on the set

From the Inquirer tabloid Bandera: Controversial Celeb was feeling blue. Latest sweetheart had just publicly given up on their “romance” and CC looked inconsolable.

Overly dramatic, CC walked the studio hallways with head bowed, holding back tears kuno.

Lost in that personal telenovela, CC wouldn’t even acknowledge coworkers—not even Glamorous Newsmaker, who was dismayed by the cheap stunt.

Recently, still sleep-walking along the corridor, CC bumped into a wall—to the amusement of onlookers.

Kasi naman.

Identity theft 1

Flamboyant Personality was shocked to discover Giddy Fan’s posts in cyberspace.

The groupie claimed that she bumped into FP in a mall and that FP was wearing a flimsy outfit.

One of the posts was accompanied by snapshots. But that was not FP in the photos! GF had fallen victim to FP’s Notorious Impostor. FP and NI don’t really look alike, but some people still get conned.

FP promptly warned netizens about NI.

Identity theft 2

Another Industry Veteran’s brush with identity theft was a tad more disturbing.

Dubious Character had long been pretending to be IV online, trolling cyberspace with the mission to seduce clueless men.

DC reportedly tried to molest Seasoned Hunk, who escaped from the predator’s claws in the nick of time.

IV soon learned of DC’s shenanigans and promptly issued a caveat on the Net.

Will this save other struggling male starlets from exploitation by creepy DC?

Face off

Talented Performer upstaged Glitzy Entertainer in a show. Unforgiving GE went around criticizing TP.

GE not only cast aspersions on TP’s professionalism; he also made fun of TP’s physical appearance. These comments soon reached TP.

Is that why TP got hooked on cosmetic surgery?

But then again, in spite of the makeover, TP has failed to approximate GE’s allure.

FOR MARIAN Rivera and Dingdong Dantes, a US holiday

Old tricks

Seems Dazzling Star is back to old ways. In spite of a tarnished track record, DS was given another chance by the industry.

Still, DS remained difficult, arriving  hours late for shoots. More time would then be spent dolling up DS, prolonging the delay. When harassed staffers inquired if the makeup artist was finished, DS invariably snapped: “Why are you rushing me?”

Can’t teach ’em new tricks.

Top of Bandera

This week’s top show biz news in Bandera (and why we are moved, if we are  moved):

Mark Bautista may hinahanting na  “mystery girl.” (How… mysterious, considering… )

Mystery girl ni Mark Bautista mang-aawit sa Iglesia ni Cristo; Mark handa raw magpa-convert. (Talk is cheap; show us.)

Inaabuso ang pagtitiwala nina Mommy Divine at Daddy Delfin; Matteo Guidicelli ’di na iginalang si Sarah Geronimo, kung saan-saan nagyayakapan. (Sus, nagyayakapan lang, eh!)

Mismong si Pooh ang kumuha, sa isang club sa Canada; video ni Pokwang pinagtripan, nahuling nakikipaglaplapan sa foreigner. (She’s adult and single. ’Yun lang.)

Para siguruhin ang kaligtasan habang nasa taping; TV5 binigyan ng bodyguard si Jasmine Curtis-Smith. (Who’d wanna hurt her? It’s not like she’s assaulting anyone by singing out of tune.)

Dahil sa inis kay Herbert Bautista, Kris Aquino pinatigil ang taping ng “Kris TV.” (Tantrums:  Unprofessional.)

Kris on Herbert: “Oo, winasak niya ang puso ko!” (Is he that…? Gee, we can’t find the word.)

Maegan Aguilar nilalangaw ang mga show sa iba’t ibang bar. (If she’s talented, let’s all go watch her instead of snickering.)

Marian Rivera, 2 linggong absent sa “Eat Bulaga,” mami-miss ang pamimigay ng pera at mga regalo sa Dabarkads; pero magpapakaligaya sa kandungan ni Dingdong Dantes sa Amerika. (We’re sure they’ll find time to see the sights.)

Toni Gonzaga sipsip sa PBB, kinontra ang reklamo ng manonood. (Well, she’s part of the production.)

Julie Anne San Jose natatakot mag-concert sa Araneta Coliseum? (She has good reason to. Not everyone can fill that place up.)

Angelica Panganiban, John Lloyd Cruz nagpakaligaya sa Thailand, bonggang “honeymoon” sa yate. (Well, with his “brand-new” body…)

Claudine Barretto natakot damputin ng mga pulis, kusang sumuko; nagpiyansa ng P100,000 para makalaya. (And this drama that no one wants anything to do with continues…)