Marc Abaya fondly recalls life with his legendary mother

MARC. Puts negative feedback to good use.

What are actor-musician Marc Abaya’s fondest recollections of his mother, ace director Marilou Diaz-Abaya? Marc shares, “I remember unending conversations with her. She said on many occasions that, if she were asked to choose just one vocation, it would be teaching. When I began performing, she told me to set aside my ego and be mindful of the audience—artists should never forget who we’re doing it for!”

The legendary filmmaker’s prodigious oeuvre included “Brutal,” “Moral,” “Karnal,” “Alyas Baby Tsina,” “Jose Rizal,” “Muro-Ami,” “Bagong Buwan” and the compelling religious drama, “Ikaw Ang Pag-ibig.”

Success

While it may have looked like Marilou was handed success on a sparkling silver platter, Marc revealed to us that even his well-loved mother went through rigorous hurdles to get to the top. He recalls, “My mom used to tell me stories about her haters—and this was way back in the ’80s, when she began making a name for herself in a male-dominated profession, and it was harder for women to be on top of things.

Marilou Diaz-Abaya

“But, my mom taught me how to put negative feedback to good use: If 30 out of 50 haters tells me that I should have projected more in ‘Closer’ (the play he acted in last year), perhaps I should have taken that into consideration, and come out of the whole experience a better performer! My foray into the legitimate stage has shaken me to the core—it introduced me to a whole new discipline that has even crossed over to my music.”

When Marc isn’t acting, he makes great music with his rock band, Kjwan. What fulfilment does he get? He beams, “Despite who my parents are, I believe I am who I am because of music. Doing well in acting would be honoring my parents (his father is award-winning cinematographer Manolo Abaya)—that’s added pressure that I’ll never escape from—but, music is my thing.

“My dad and I got closer after my mom passed away. But, I continue to talk to her in prayer. As a mother, she wasn’t the smothering type who would say, ‘Ang galing-galing ng anak ko!’ She was open and honest till the very end!”