Insider sacked for harassing upstarts

XIAN Lim makes fans go berserk in a mall.

A well-placed mole confirmed a long-held suspicion in the biz.

High-flying Insider was booted from major company after good-looking aspirants complained that HI tried to victimize them during an out-of-town sortie.

Also, several Cute Upstarts earlier raised a fuss because only those “favored” by HI had been given choice projects.

When the bosses got wind of these, HI’s head was put on the chopping block. Actually, it seems HI merely wanted to replicate shady goings-on in another firm.

Carry that weight

Influential Insider can be quite strict. II went ballistic because Pretty Newcomer had gained weight.

II had no qualms about embarrassing PN, even though the starlet is related to biz royalty. He scolded her in public: “Slim down or quit. Your talent fee is too high for you to look dowdy.”

CRISTINE Reyes gets tangled in a web of romantic intrigues.

But karma really has a way of catching up with … everyone. II soon had the same weight problem, and is now being pressured by bosses to shed the unwanted poundage.

Rambling rose

Remember Stunning Starlet, who raised not a few brows because of her erratic behavior?

SS is often spotted giggling—even when she’s by her lonesome. In public events, SS frequently babbles, mouthing non-sequiturs left and right.

Worse, she frequently appears scantily clad in public. Maybe she wants to attract as many admirers as possible.

Different strokes.

Ageist Inc.

Top Company seems to have an unwritten policy against seasoned actors.

RAYVER Cruz is smarting from a high-profile breakup.

When any talent reaches a certain age, Powerful Insider gets antsy and summons loyal minions.

“You had better replace these old ones with younger stars,” he would blurt out.

Even if the neophytes they find are still raw and untested, they will be prioritized over more experienced and skilled actors.

PI should know that actors become more effective as they grow older!

Tragically, by the time the novices learn how to act, they’re usually old news for PI anyway.

Controversial connection

A mole insists that there’s a scandalous reason behind Prominent Insider’s rabid hate campaign against Controversial Personality.

This was because CP linked PI’s name to Minor Celebrity— although even the grapevine once insisted that PI and MC had a thing going.

Apparently, CP’s Fearless Supporter suspected that the best way to annoy PI would be to mention MC’s name.

It worked!

LUCY Torres is a frequent flyer.

Top of Bandera

The top show biz news in the Inquirer tabloid Bandera (and why we are moved if we are moved):

Pops mas bumata at sumeksi nang mawalan ng dyowa; Regine: Napakalaki ng utang na loob ko kina Pipay at Martin! (That’s the trick? Lose the man?)

Francine Prieto kinarir ang pagtatapon ng taba, sexy na uli. (We know a few others who should do this, too, right?)

Kawawa naman, tuloy lang daw ang pang-aasar kay Rayver Cruz; Derek, Cristine huli sa aktong nag-iinuman sa bar, naglasingan daw? (Sows, nag-iinuman lang e?)

GMA masama ang loob kay Dingdong dahil sa “One More Try”? (Well, they should have cast him in “Sosy Problems”!)

Marian inokray-okray ang pagsasalita ng English sa “Temptation of Wife.” (Leave the English to those who can speak it well. The writers are to blame.)

Cristine nakipaghiwalay daw kay Rayver dahil may ibang lalaking mahal. (Rayver, dude, how does it feel to dodge a bullet?)

Kahit buking na, Gerald todo tanggi pa rin sa relasyon nila ni Maja. (Just wait till they get a movie project.)

Lucy Torres halos sa eroplano na nakatira, daig pa ang stewardess. (Which makes Goma … what?)

Robin kay Kris: Hindi kita pakakawalan, kasi ’di ba, pinakawalan mo na ako noon! (Ew.)

Baka si Anne ang pagselosan ni Mariel, hindi si Kris. (Which is more likely, no?)

Maja baka ‘pinaglalamayan’ na ngayon dahil sa matinding galit ng fans ni Kim. (Fans, stay out of this.)

Heart kay Chiz: Halik sa pisngi ok sa akin, pero ‘yung laplap, oh, my God! (OMG can mean sooo many things. Promise.)

Kahit may anak na, Sheree nagpakita pa rin ng boobs. (Who?)

Kris: Para kay Bimby, ayoko nang magsalita about James! (Good call.)

MAJA Salvador incurs the ire of rabid fans.

Buhay nina Jose at Wally nabili na ng GMA 7.  (Sounds like blackmail fodder for later.)

Osang nabwisit sa production ng ABS-CBN, nag-walk out dahil sa tagal ng taping. (Like it was a total surprise.)

Sey ng baguhang rapper: Hindi ko nabuntis si Bea Binene! (Anlabo mo.)

Coco handa na uling makipagbakbakan, “Juan dela Cruz” kasado na. (Naku, siguro jealous na naman si … )

Mismong si Annabelle raw ang naghatid sa airport; Sarah tinakasan na ang mga kaso sa Pinas, lumayas patungong Switzerland.  (Wala kasing snow dito e.)

Kris: Ito na ang pinakagwapong Robin Padilla na mapapanood n’yo! (He does look like he swallowed the fountain of youth.)

Gay personality nababaliw kay Enchong: Sasambahin ko talaga siya araw at gabi! (Devoted ka, ’teh?)

Kris pinisil-pisil ang isang judge sa MasterChef. (Go ahead and touch the chef, huwag lang the food.)

Joey di magpapatalo kay Willie, walang balak mag-resign sa TV5. (Standoff!)

“Indio” ni Bong humataw agad sa ratings game. (Making up for the MMFF crash, yes?)

Derek panggulo lang sa lovelife ni Cristine. (She doesn’t need help in that department.)

Julie Anne San Jose nanakawan daw sa dressing room ng “Party Pilipinas.”  (Nanakawan ng …?)

Mall show nina Maja, Kim, Xian at Enchong, biglang itinigil, daan-daang fans nagkagulo. (Well, when you put that many good-looking celebs together …)

Matapos mapawalang-sala sa kasong tax evasion, Juday nag-iiyak, pero nagbanta ang BIR; tuloy pa rin ang kaso . (Uh- oh.)

Bagong show ni Willie sa TV5 pinakamagastos, studio pa lang milyones na raw ang budget. (Dude, you might want to dial it down.)

Alex (Gonzaga) pinsan ni Chris Tiu ang BF, may bodyguard pa rin pag nakipag-date. (Asus.)

Kung magkakaroon man daw siya ng girlfriend, Coco: Ayoko ng taga-show biz, sobrang seloso rin kasi ako! (Hot-headed! Challenging.)

Phil: Gusto ko si Angel na ang pakakasalan ko! (Did he say that in English, to boot? Wow!)

Pokwang sa bar nakilala ang foreigner na dyowa. (Define bar.)

Pikon na pikon na raw sa mga patutsada ni Sarah: ’Wag n’yo akong husgahan; hindi niyo alam ang totoo! —Gerald. (Well? We’re listening.)

Derek inis na inis sa tsismis sa kanila ni Cristine. (Because it’s true or because it’s not?)