Minions upstage boisterous celeb

Veteran Insider has a theory on the reason behind Cantankerous Banshee’s seemingly strange behavior of late.

The spy suspects CB is on the verge of a major meltdown.

CB was devastated by recent reversals of fortune. From the top of the heap, CB has rolled down to the pits of infamy.

Worse, so-called “inferiors” have upstaged CB.

To think these underlings once worshipped the ground CB walked on. CB used to regard them as mere minions who were hopeless and harmless. CB even encouraged the bosses to give Engaging Celebrity and Controversial Misfit a break.

Alas, they chose to reward EC and CM with CB’s old gig!

If only CB kept quiet (an impossibility!), then things would’ve been different.

Usual suspect

The workplace was rocked by a scandal involving several gofers who landed in hot water. They insisted that they were innocent, though, and pointed to someone else as the culprit.

Soon enough, the supervisors uncovered something fishy.

All clues point to the usual suspect, Tawdry Advocate, who is notorious for spearheading such dubious endeavors.

Will superiors punish TA? Or will they look the other way? Is this why TA possesses an air of invincibility? Is this why TA commits all sorts of misdemeanors with impunity?

Tsk. Tsk.

Very versatile

Who knew Lascivious Maven, who is dripping with testosterone, has a soft, feminine side, too.

As a show biz newbie, LM pursued a scorching hot affair with Ubiquitous Jouster. People thought LM acted as the “man” in this clandestine relationship.

Turned out LM was into role-playing and could portray the “damsel in distress,” if needed.

LM could perform UJ’s every desire in the boudoir.

Rated V for Versatile!

Prey to predator

Which brings us to another multitalented performer…

In spite of his image as a hot hunk, Salacious Personality swings both ways, as well.

As a newcomer, SP served as Pugnacious Rake’s favorite playmate—on and off the hard court! SP likewise had flings with swishy denizens, including Bodacious Legend.

Later on, SP moved from being the prey to the predator. SP allegedly shacked up with younger stud, Macho Maverick, for a while.

Mama’s boy

From the Inquirer tabloid Bandera:

Friends were curious how Valiant Gigolo managed to remain single for a long time. A source insisted it was because VG was a certified mama’s boy.

VG would invariably prioritize his beloved mother over the other women in his life.

If mom called in the middle of a romantic date, VG would rush home and leave the poor girlfriend by her lonesome at the resto.

VG’s mommy dearest eventually learned to let go, and the loving son was finally given the freedom to raise his own family years later.

Top of the show biz news

For those who missed last weekend’s show biz news on TV (and why we are moved, if we are moved):

Anne Curtis on doing a song number while suspended in mid-air in her recent concert: “Syempre kinabahan ako, pero ganun talaga ako kabaliw, eh!” (It was nerve-wracking for us, too… but because of the vocal acrobatics.)

Charo Santos-Concio on Mother Lily Monteverde: “We learned the art of commercial filmmaking from her.” (Master class?)

Kathryn Bernardo on her relationship with Daniel Padilla: “Sa isang relationship, hindi ’yan smooth parati.” (OK.)

Daniel on Kathryn: “Darating ang point na araw-araw na kayong magkasama. Pero nami-miss ko pa rin s’ya!” (OA!)

Daniel on how he differentiates “mature” from “sexy” roles: “Kung maglalabas man ng skin, lagi s’yang elegante.” (Oh.)

Bugoy Drilon on celebrating his 10th anniversary with a concert: “Masaya ako na umabot ako ng ganito katagal. ‘Di ako makapaniwala.” (Kami rin!)

Arjo Atayde on getting good reviews for his performance in “BuyBust”: “I have no words for it; I’m still in shock. That was my first legitimate movie.” (May illegitimate film ba?)

Sylvia Sanchez on being a proud mom: “Mas natutuwa ako kapag sinasabihan ako na, ‘Magaling ang anak mo,’ kaysa, ‘Magaling ka.’” (Look sa sky.)

Heart Evangelista

Heart Evangelista, a Paws advocate, on adopted “aspin” Panda’s coming trip: “Hopefully, makapunta s’ya (Panda) sa Paris just to prove a point!” (What an expensive point!)

Heart on why she turned emotional when asked about trying for a baby again: “I’m a very happy person, but it [the miscarriage] hurts me every day. But as a woman, you have to know how to face the situation with grace, and I’m also very inspired by other women who went through the same thing.” (Sings: Be brave, little one…)

Kate Valdez on her recent debut party: “Parang panaginip lang lahat, nakalutang sa saya. Ang dami palang nagmamahal sa ’kin.” (Ah, to be young and beautiful!)

Marian Rivera

Marian Rivera on juggling acting and mommy duties: “Mahirap naman talaga pagsabay-sabayin. Pero syempre, kung mahal mo ang ginagawa mo, magagawan mo ng paraan.” (If there’s a will, there’s a car!)

Sanya Lopez on playing a mother in her upcoming soap: “Kailangan kong i-explore kung paano ba kasi I never even had a boyfriend! So, tignan natin.” (That’s why they call it acting, girl.)

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