Germatologist, hard killers and other boob-tube booboos
HOST: Do you have a favorite actress?
Guest: Oh, yes.
Host: Who is she?
Guest: Angelina Julie!
(Ah, please repeat for the second twice?)
* * *
Host: Did the firemen say what was the probable cause of the fire?
Field reporter: Ah, I think it was electrical failure, or something.
(Wow, thanks for the great reporting!)
* * *
Host: Do the cops already have a suspect in the crime?
Another reporter: Ah, they think it was a hard killer.
(Isa ka pa!)
* * *
Host: Why do you love dancing?
Guest: Oh, it gives me a very special and beautiful feeling—when you dance, you’re flowing like a water!
(—Let’s not get carried away, shall we?)
* * *
Host: Anong tinatanim nyo sa farm nyo?
Guest: Ah, salad po.
(Wow, may kasama nang dressing? Yum!)
* * *
Host: What should teenagers do about a severe case of pimples?
Guest: The best solution is for them not to rely on home remedies, but to go to a germatologist!
(No, the last thing they need is—more germs!)
* * *
Host: What do new graduates need to have a good work and career after college?
Guest: Above all, confidence—it really goes along the way!
(Ah, come again?)
* * *
Host: What can you tell us about the storm condition where you’re at right now?
Field reporter: Oh, the storm is really hitting us hard—the rain is very wet and the lightning is bright!
(Now, can you tell us something we didn’t already know?)
***
Host: Your pageant is holding its finals next week?
Guest: That’s right, we will soon know kung sino ang dapat tanggalin as winner!
(Ah, you mean tanghalin, don’t you?)
***
Host: Aren’t you worried about rumors of possible plots against the government?
Guest: Not really, they’re too vague to take seriously. There should be more solid evidence of the allegedly stabilization plot!
(—Baliktad yata!)
More intestines?
Host: What will it take to really bring down the crime rate?
Guest: Maybe not enough people know about our anticrime campaign—so, we have to intestify the campaign!
(That’s right, add more guts—intestines!)
* * *
Host: What do you think about the embattled mayor—is he guilty?
Guest: Oh, no, I think he is a straight and narrow!
(Quote, unquote!)
* * *
Host: If you have any reactions to the issues we discussed today, just contact us.
Cohost: Yes, just contact our program—if you can call it that.
(Come to think of it—!)
