Lady Gaga’s ‘Artpop’ has more flash than substance

TERPSICHOREAN pulse-pounders from the 27-year-old pop provocateur.

Is Lady Gaga a hermaphrodite? —OK, she isn’t. But, more than the hip-swinging vibe of “Manicure,” the deliciously self-indulgent “Donatella,” and the shriek-and-croon harmony she shares with R. Kelly in “Do What U Want” (from this week’s No. 1 album, “Artpop”), this is precisely the kind of tabloid-style story that keeps her “trending” in social media.

So far, it’s working like clockwork: The debut of “Artpop” is the third-largest bow for a female artist this year, after Katy Perry’s “Prism” and Miley Cyrus’ similarly controversy-riddled “Bangerz.”

With more flash than substance, Gaga’s album stretches the limits of the electro-pop dance genre and hammers listeners with terpsichorean pulse-pounders.

But, the 27-year-old provocateur also enjoys shocking the public with her outrageous costumes, or amuses it with her catty exchanges with Madonna and Katy Perry—her music just isn’t enough, even when it deserves our sole attention.

Informed decisions

Make no mistake: Like her seamlessly engineered dance tunes, Gaga makes conscious and informed decisions about her career choices, as the album opener, “Aura,” affirms: “I’m not a wandering slave, I’m a woman of choice.” Her repertoire is carefully calibrated to please its record-buying target audience.

But, how does the dance music diva expect people to take her seriously if she’s still posing the same, whiny contradictions after four chart-topping albums? The “gimmick” makes for reliable dance floor stompers, but it’s becoming repetitive and tedious—even for the Monster Queen of Reinvention herself!

And, picking on Madonna only makes her seem lugubrious. After all, when you listen to Gaga’s ’80s send-up, “Venus,” the flirtatious “Sexxx Dreams,”and the standout sing-and-rap number, “G.U.Y,” you can’t help but think of the Material Girl at her most provocative (“Vogue,” “Justify My Love”).

Sturdier vocals

Moreover, you can even mash-up “Fashion” with “Holiday,” the 1983 dance classic from Madonna’s self-titled debut album! To be fair, Gaga has sturdier vocals than the 58-year-old Pop Queen—as she demonstrates in the bruising, Debbie Harry-channeling ballad, “Dope,” the rallying “Gypsy,” and the fascinating albeit underperforming “Applause.”

Finally, there’s one “spanking” cut (“Swine”) that seems like a snug-fit for some of our unapologetically corrupt government officials—and, we’d love to see Lady Gaga’s pungent disgust scare the heebie-jeebies out of them:

She rails, “Don’t think I wanna hear another word from you/ You’re just an animal/ Trying to act real special, but deep down you’re just a shrew/ You’re a pig inside a human body!” Is this a case of art imitating life? Spot on.