Biggest lesson from Kylie’s failed relationship with Aljur

Kylie Padilla

If only all ex-wives could be like Kylie Padilla, the world would be a more peaceful place. The Kapuso actress has been vocal about her good wishes for her ex Aljur Abrenica and his girlfriend, AJ Raval.

She is not at all combative. That’s the exact opposite of the character she portrays in “Mga Lihim ni Urduja” (airs on GMA at 8 p.m. weeknights). The groundbreaking drama set in precolonial and modern worlds is a reunion project of the well-loved “Encantadia” Sang’gres: Kylie as Gem, Gabbi Garcia as Crystal and Sanya Lopez as Hara Urduja.

What better way to celebrate Women’s Month than by channeling our inner Urduja?

Here’s my chat with Kylie:

In what ways are you like Urduja?

We are both very protective when it comes to our loved ones. And as a single mom, I need the kind of strength and warrior energy that Urduja exudes when she goes to war for her empire (laughs).

What advice did your dad Robin give you?

He made me watch “Charlie’s Angels,” “Lord of the Rings,” “Underworld,” “Joan of Arc” and play video games with strong female characters like “Resident Evil.” He told me stories of Gabriela Silang and other super women. At an early age, he trained me to believe I was an equal … that being a woman is a strength, not a weakness.

When your kids are old enough, what will you tell them about the end of your love story with their dad Aljur?

Even now, I tell my kids that their dad and I are on good terms. That we loved each other and, more importantly, that we love them unconditionally. Sometimes, we go out with the kids so that nakikita nila na OK kami.

When they’re old enough to understand, I will explain that in life, things won’t work out sometimes, but it doesn’t mean there is no way to repair the relationship even in the form of friendship.

Ayoko rin silang i-shield sa reality ng buhay. Pwede rin namang magkaroon ng closure and magandang relationship in spite of all the bad things that happened.

What’s your advice to girls who are still hung up on their exes?

I am happy for my ex because we were quite unhappy just before we separated. When you love someone, you don’t like seeing them unhappy. And instead na pilitin namin, I knew we were better off apart. But before getting to that point, I promised myself na labas ang mga bata sa pinagdadaanan namin. I want them to always have a relationship with their dad.

Moving on is a long process. When you are in so much pain, cry it out. Acknowledge that you are not OK. The only way to truly heal is to feel it. Be around people who love and support you. Travel. Learn something new. Work out. Huwag mo mamadaliin.

When worse comes to worst, repeat this quote in your head, “Nabuhay naman ako nang wala siya before ko siya makilala, kaya ko ulit ng wala siya (laughs).” That’s what I do.

What is the biggest lesson you learned from your relationship with Aljur?

Never be forced into doing something just to please other people. Trust in your intuition. If it feels wrong, it probably is.

What kind of guy would make you want to fall again?

A guy with a sense of responsibility, who knows how to have fun, who can make me laugh, likes to travel, accepts that I have a strong personality, and who can love my kids just as much as they love me.

Wearing pink at ‘MoM’ premiere

Viva Films pulled out all the stops for the red carpet premiere of Darryl Yap’s “Martyr or Murderer” (MoM) at SM The Block Cinemas 1, 2 and 3. The lobby was lavishly decorated Moroccan-style since MoM is partly about the Morocco chapter of Imee Marcos’ life in exile. To complete the look, Imee was garbed in Moroccan fashion.

Since I’m a Kakampink, I dared to wear pink at the premiere. I was there to support my BFF (for over a decade and counting) Buboy (Cesar Montano), who reprises his role as Ferdinand Marcos Sr. True friendship like ours is (political) color-blind.

Being dressed in pink was my way of saying that I won’t let MoM sway me. I was touched when Direk Da (Darryl) told me that he loves me, even if I’m a Kakampink. He’s one filmmaker you either hate or love, but there’s no way that he can be ignored. Yap is such an “enfant terrible.”

My fave scene in MoM is the one where BFF sang Nonoy Zuñiga’s “I’ll Never Say Goodbye.” He told me that he recorded it in his home studio. I chided him, “You should dedicate the song to your one and only … the following (in alphabetical order).” Then, we both had a good laugh when I teased him “Most of their names start with an S, so chronological order na lang.”

Another scene that I like is the one where Christine Reyes (as Imee) wanders aimlessly in a souk in Morocco as she yearns for her dad. Imee said that she could not hold back her tears while watching the heavy scenes. I teared up too because of BFF’s heartfelt portrayal. My fave line in MoM goes, “There’s a thin line between being kind and being tanga.”

Spoiler alert: The big reveal at the end of the film is Aga Muhlach as Bongbong Marcos in “Mabuhay, Aloha, Mabuhay,” the final part of the trilogy.

Is “Martyr or Murderer” a question that is better left unanswered? That depends on who’s asking.