Nadine Lustre
If there’s one project Nadine Lustre would consider the “most challenging” in her career, it would be the movie “Never Not Love You.”
But it wasn’t so much about the difficulty of the role she had to portray as it was about the mental and emotional space she was in prior to the shooting.
The cameras began to roll in January 2018—only three months after the death of her younger brother.
She wasn’t ready.
“It was the most challenging movie for me because of what was happening that time. I was lost, so depressed. I didn’t want to do it. I didn’t want to work. I didn’t even want to see my friends,” Nadine told the Inquirer, shortly after a shoot for the face care brand Pond’s campaign, #SeeWhatHappens, which seeks to help women overcome hesitations and self-doubt.
“I wanted to just stay at home and grieve. I was down,” the 25-year-old actress recalled.
But Nadine knew that, at one point, she would have to will herself back on her feet.
“I had to get back up eventually and move forward—even though every step I took hurt,” she said. “Thankfully, I was able to get through it.”
“Never Not Love You” saw Nadine turning in one of her career’s finest performances yet, earning approval from critics.
In a span of three months—from April to June this year—she was named best actress by three critics-based award-giving bodies: the Young Critics Circle, Urian, and Famas.
“I’m thankful to all the people who stuck with me and supported me. At the end of the day, it’s up to you to decide if you want to move on,” Nadine said.
While all the trying experiences she has had in her career and personal life toughened her up, it doesn’t mean that she’s impervious to insecurities and feelings of inadequacy.
“In terms of appearance, I do have my share of insecurities—I wish I were taller!” Nadine said, laughing. “But you know, at the end of the day, you just have to accept those things. Be happy and thankful. And work with what you’ve got.”
Nadine is the kind of person who’s always bent on “beating my high score.”
But it can be a double-edged sword: It’s a good thing because the perfectionist in her pushes her to do her best; and a bad thing because she tends to be too hard on herself when she fails to do her best.
“I get upset when I feel I didn’t push myself enough during a scene. I get disappointed when I don’t achieve something I want,” she said. “I get upset when I get a creative block—when I can’t write, paint or dance.”
As if the standards she has set for herself weren’t exacting enough, she also used to feel compelled to meet the standards other people set for her.
“All these comments, bashing on social media … people who want me to fit their mold. It (2015, while doing ‘On the Wings of Love’) was a time when I felt lost; I was questioning myself a lot,” she said. “But I soon realized that I should stop listening to these [negative things] people say about me and just be myself.”
“I used to be afraid to confide in my loved ones about my problems or the things that make me sad, because I always wanted to put on a brave face,” she said.
It was her boyfriend, James Reid, who changed that tendency. “He taught me to open up whenever I have issues, big or small. He tells me that you can’t just hold onto these things because they will just pile up and do you harm,” she said.
At the moment, the actress is enjoying a well-earned break, focusing on the little things she had been putting off for the longest time. “I’m having fun, just chilling at home and not worrying too much. I’m doing errands, managing my finances,” Nadine said.
Has she thought about rewarding herself after all her achievements this year?
“All the blessings I have been getting are the rewards themselves. But really, I’m happy with good food. After a hard day’s work, I eat at my favorite restaurants—it’s that simple,” Nadine said.