Delays hound popular pair’s project

Numerous problems keep hounding the latest project of Popular Pair.

Well, for starters, PP seems grievously unprepared for such a mammoth undertaking.

Veteran Insider was shocked to realize the insurmountable challenges that PP often faced on the set. A mole claims that the clueless couple’s less-than-stellar abilities caused unnecessary delays at work.

Staffers are now working double time to beat the deadline—which hangs perilously like the sword of Damocles over their heads.

Making matters worse, the bosses shielded spoiled PP from all the production woes.

Blissfully unaware of their limitations, PP would end up repeating the same mistakes over and over again.

Oh no!

Turnaround

Talk about confusing.

Grizzled Thespian has been heaping hosannas on Major Star of late. Is it because GT wants MS’ followers to support a new venture?

GT, who claims to be a loyal admirer, was unmasked, though.

Asked to name a fave idol, GT singled out MS’ Staunch Rival, instead.

Playing safe or just plain inconsistent?

You be the judge.

Secret regimen

No wonder Glamorous Celeb is able to maintain an hour-glass figure—in spite of an unhealthy lifestyle.

GC keeps the pounds at bay with a secret diet of illicit drugs. Coworkers are aware of GC’s nasty addictions.

Feisty Colleague once scolded GC about the dangerous habit in front of other people.

Now, handlers are tripping all over themselves to convince the public that GC is no coke-snorting fiend.

Too late.

Sooner or later

Minions are still hoping against hope that Cantankerous Luminary’s decision would change.

Unfortunately, CL’s Fearless Bosses are undeterred, as well.

CL and FBs failed to see eye to eye on several issues, and they thought it was time to cut their losses before it’s too late.

CL’s Rabid Supporters are crossing their fingers, however. After all, RS benefited from CL’s reign of terror in the firm.

But all good, and bad, things must come to an end, sooner or later.

Attention junkie

From the Inquirer tabloid Bandera:

Seems fame is Greying Beauty’s drug of choice.

Alas, GB is no longer as popular (and young) as before. To get a regular fix of adulation, GB would frequent bazaars and other flea markets.

GB would then bask in the attention provided by both vendors and fellow shoppers.

Problem was, GB could be a tad stingy. GB kept haggling for discounts—infuriating the hapless salespeople.

To top it off, GB would often go home without buying anything.

File under KSP.

Top of the Tabloids

VIVIAN Velez

This week’s top show biz news in the Inquirer tabloid Bandera (and why we are moved, if we are moved):

Claudine Barretto, Solenn Heussaff, negative rin sa paggamit ng  droga. (Moving on.)

Vivian Velez nagalit sa DFA  dahil sa hindi kaagad pag-renew ng kanyang passport. (Hala!)

JC Santos nahiyang ipakilala sa press ang girlfriend na theater actress. (But why?)

Mocha Uson “binugbog” ng netizens dahil sa pagsisipsip kay President Duterte. (Coming soon: “Trolls” the movie.)

MAINE Mendoza (left) and Alden Richards

Say ni Yeng Constantino: “Sinadya po namin ng asawa ko na huwag munang magka-baby!” (Family planning ang tawag diyan.)

Mark Bautista gustong bumalik sa ABS-CBN, nagpasalamat sa GMA 7. (Change is coming din daw.)

Netizens napa-yuck sa hubad na katawan ni BB Gandanghari! (Hiyang hiya naman kami sa pagkabusilak n’yo.)

Book 2 ng kalyeserye nina Alden Richards at Maine Mendoza sa “Eat Bulaga” pinaghahandaan ng AlDub Nation. (Abangan…Asawa ni…)

Kris Aquino on the rumor that she’s transferring to another channel: “Under construction” pa po ako ngayon! (At least hindi “out of order.”)