Public face vs private life

Right now, “The Voice Kids” is enjoying incredible ratings (many thanks to the show’s many fans), which means we are viewed by millions of people.

I don’t mean the coaches (Bamboo, Sarah Geronimo and myself), but the kids who are inching their way to the Live Semi-Finals on July 19 and 20, and the Grand Finals on July 26 and 27.

Darlene. Darren. Echo. Grazz. Giedie. Sam. Lyca. Kyle. Stacy. Edray. Juan Karlos. That’s just to name a few. These are kids whose YouTube Blind Audition videos are totaling millions of views. For each one, privacy is slowly but surely disappearing, thanks to a viewing public that craves to know more about them.

Perhaps the coaching should include a course titled “Public vs Private 101.”

Where do public figures draw the line between what is shared and what is sacred? What they readily talk about and what they keep close to the chest? How do they decide when to talk and when to shut up? In this era of social-media sharing, how do they keep their privacy?

I posed the question on Facebook for my actor, singer and director friends to get their insights.

Carlos Celdran  

Multimedia artist

“Don’t give the whole cow away. Just give the impression that you do. Have black-out days on social media, for peace of mind.”

Mcoy Fundales 

Lead singer, Kenyo

“I look much better in person than on TV, [so] nobody recognizes me in public and I can go on my merry way.”

Jong Cuenco 

Musician

“I have two Facebook accounts—one for fans and followers and one strictly for friends.”

Becca Godinez 

Singer/actress

“Learn to say no without fear of repercussion. Let people know that, in public, you give 150 percent but … your private life must be respected.”

Luis Manzano 

Actor, TV host

“It’s as simple as not answering questions you feel are too close to home. Keeping another group of friends or support system very far away from show biz.”

Christian Bautista 

Singer/actor

“I require my family, friends—people not from show biz—to slap me if I lose myself or become an ass. I take days off just to relax and reflect, without Twitter or Facebook. Emerging from these days, I’m raring to go back to work with fresh ideas and renewed energy. The gold mine is finding people who support and love you for who you are.”

Dennis Marasigan 

Theater and film director

“It’s best if there’s not much difference between the public persona and the private self, but I believe that people are more than willing to accept it when an artist is willing to show only a public face and keep the rest of his life private.”

***

From these answers, it seems to me that one should take the cue from the artist on what to talk about and what to keep hidden away.

I remember, as I was growing up in the biz, my mother would tell me to never ever give out my home phone number. She would bar the press and publicity people from showing, in any way, what the front of our home looks like. She was very strict about what was to be kept within the family and what was OK to discuss in public. As I got older, I followed her lead and made a few rules of my own.

Motor mouth 

If I were talking about a television show, a film or a concert, taking part in an ad campaign for a product I’m endorsing, speaking about charitable organizations I support, or simply about the art and craft of singing, then by all means I’ll be a motor mouth and share as much as I absolutely can.

On social media, I will post a few pictures of a family vacation, of my daughter trying to catch a fish, or of my dog sleeping.

News, food 

I will have an opinion on the day’s burning news, share an article that I find particularly entertaining or stimulating, and wax poetic about food that I like.

However, I will not share my current location if I’m out in public shopping or doing my groceries.

I won’t alert the media either, when eating out with friends, in order to protect not just my privacy, but theirs as well. I will not talk about what’s happening within my family’s inner circle because that business belongs to no one outside of it.

I will not make a spectacle of myself in a restaurant or on camera, as I am fully aware of my public image, and will do what I must to protect it. If I receive gifts from other celebrities, I shall thank them privately, also to protect them.

Everything in my work is subject to public opinion and scrutiny; but my private life? Not everything about it is an opportunity for publicity.

This is a tough lesson to learn, but one that is necessary if my sanity is to prevail.

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