Romance for hire

LIM AND CHIU. Marriage is no laughing matter.

Kim Chiu and Xian Lim goof it up in Mae Czarina Cruz’s “Bride for Rent” where the attractive tandem turns a fraudulent wedding vow into a lifetime of commitment—but, that’s easier said than done. As the adorable married couples they interview attest, marriage is no laughing matter.

After the success of the amusingly quirky “Bakit Hindi Ka Crush Ng Crush Mo?,” Lim and Chiu crank their loopy screen antics up a notch by playing a dishy but stuck-up playboy and his kooky patsy, respectively.

As it has in the past, the rich-boy, poor-girl dichotomy works wonders for the love team’s latest potboiler, delivering belly laughs as much for its irreverent gaffes as its self-deprecating tone, courtesy of the inner comedienne that Kim has since found useful in her yearning for thespic “diversification.”

Advertising executive Roderico Espiritu Jr. (Lim) and bit player Racquelita de la Cruz (Chiu) don’t have much in common—but, they’re “forced” to get along with each other when the former finds himself in dire financial straits after a drinking and gambling binge.

Convenient way out

The P10-million sum Rocco stands to collect from his “maturing” trust fund is a convenient way out of his money woes, but only if he honors a fiduciary condition that requires him to tie the knot at age 25—a way for his grandmother (Pilita Corrales), the trust’s settlor, to teach the happy-go-lucky lothario a thing or two about love and responsibility. The elusive bachelor needs a “bride” who won’t linger, pronto.

As the rom-com gods would have it, the beleaguered gent ends up hiring the loony applicant who giddily faints into his arms the first time they meet—go figure. You can’t feign surprise over Rocco and Rocky’s initial disagreements. But, just as we begin to see their icy resistance thawing, they realize that anything “rented” is temporary. How do they address their growing attraction for each other?

The briskly paced film whisks viewers through a checklist of clichés, turgid confrontations and ludicrous revelations—but, while there are inescapable lapses in logic, Kim’s growing comedic confidence and ineffable boldness to sell her character’s plucky persona settle comfortably into the production’s unorthodox narrative rhythms.

“Bride for Rent’s” charms are touch-and-go, because it has trouble settling into a clear and coherent story. For instance, it’s hard to resist Empoy Marquez’s idiosyncratic brand of droll self-mockery—but, which sane person could suspend disbelief that he’s a…Chinese translator?!

The spirited portrayals of Kim and Xian allow the movie’s scattershot jokes to coalesce and go beyond cornball contrivances, however. Their “fantasticating” love story benefits from the portrayals of Martin del Rosario, Pilita Corrales, Tirso Cruz III, Leo Rialp and Marquez, who make the most out of the limited screen time they’re given. (We can’t say the same thing about Kim’s annoying family.)

For the most part, director Cruz eschews believability for kwela scenes that impressionable viewers can create memes out of and discuss “trendingly” in social media. She struggles to make sense of the story’s implausibilities and sketchy mix of silliness and push-button sobriety.

If coherence doesn’t figure prominently in your moviegoing priorities, you can look the other way and let Kim and Xian’s rollicking sequences tickle your funnybone—as “Bride for Rent” rides into box-office heaven.

Moreover, the film should be commended for injecting optimism and easygoing humor into potentially schmaltzy scenes that feature couples who disclose the secrets of their successful “partnerships”—from the well-meaning widow who believes that marriage is a “series of corrected imperfections” to the octogenarian wife who stands by her increasingly senile husband.