Groovy kind of dads
Perci Intalan (left) and Jun Robles Lana adore their 18-month-old son, who is “smart and charming.”
The home of directors Jun Robles Lana and Perci Intalan now looks like Toy Kingdom because of their adopted son.
Last Christmas, friends and family sent over a deluge of gifts for Jun and Perci’s son, now 18 months old.
“We can literally open a toy store now,” Perci exclaims. “Even to this day, we get random presents from pals. We’re touched by the love and support.”
The filmmaking couple, who got married in New York (where same-sex unions are legal) in 2013, is truly appreciative of the outpouring of affection because the adoption process can be quite circuitous. It’s already complex for straight couples; more so for gay parents.
Although they cannot divulge details, one tip Jun and Perci can freely share with prospective adoptive parents is for them to secure proper legal assistance.
“Find a good lawyer,” Perci states. “It can get daunting and complicated. Now, I understand why some people would just give up or forego adoption altogether.”
They, however, understand the importance of “taking all the important steps so that our son will not encounter problems in the future.”
“We want those worries out of the way,” Perci points out.
Jun asserts: “We encourage people to adopt if they can. There are so many children born without families and homes. It’s heartbreaking to imagine what the kids go through every day just to survive.”
In the end, Perci points out, “the complications of the adoption process are worth it.”
“I love seeing and making our son laugh,” Jun quips. “It’s one of the greatest joys of parenthood.”
“Every time our son does anything new, we take pictures so we can brag about him to our friends and relatives,” Perci enthuses. “First time he walked with a walker. First time he walked without one.”
Their son has completely changed their lives. For starters, the workaholics in them have been forced to slow down considerably.
“I now choose my projects more carefully,” Jun admits. “But, Perci and I have both learned to manage our time better.”
“Fatherhood has put a new perspective on everything: Our goals, our work setup, our lifestyle, our health,” Perci notes. “Suddenly, there’s more pressure to live well, because we want to have a good future with our son.”
Parenting, which doesn’t come with a manual, can be tricky, they confess. After a year, Perci relates that they’re “still finding their way.” They’ve defined clear roles for each other, though.
“Jun is good at making our son laugh and respond. He can talk to him better,” Perci volunteers.
“Our son depends on Perci for the physical stuff. He is the one who holds our son’s hand as he walks around and tries to touch or step on everything,” Jun recounts.
Like any proud parent, Jun and Perci turn effusive when asked to describe their child.
Jun raves: “He’s smart and can charm anyone. He loves to smile and laugh, and we realized that he likes reaching out to other kids.”
They vow not to keep anything from their son. “One thing’s for sure, he’ll know he’s adopted and he will feel that it doesn’t matter because he is loved by two dads, two grandmothers and a whole bunch of uncles, aunts and cousins,” Perci remarks.
Parenting has become even more challenging now, in light of the disheartening events all over the globe.
Perci relates: “When we watch the news, Jun and I occasionally talk about how concerned we are about the kind of world our son will grow up in. It all seems so scary—even for us. But we are preparing him for it.”
Jun explains: “We only have to teach him that love always wins, that good will always triumph, and that there’s always a way to make the world a better place.”
